Putting myself out their to make mom friends was one of the best decisions of my life. Something a lot of mothers don’t talk about (or haven’t until recently) is how isolating and lonely a mom’s journey to motherhood can be. It can start from pregnancy, or maybe even earlier like when some might be trying to conceive.
For me, I am the first of my friends and siblings to have kids. So throughout my pregnancy journey, I felt very alone. No one could understand what I was going through or how crazy I always felt because of the hormones. I never wanted to go out with them or hangout because I always felt like I would be such a downer, yah know? I didn’t want to make anything awkward or weird for them.
I was isolating myself and the longer my pregnancy went on, the less and less I wanted to do anything. I was so exhausted and miserable all the time.
After my babies were born, I started feeling more like myself and I wanted to go out a little bit more. But I wanted to spend some time with people who could relate to the ups and downs of motherhood, who could offer insight and advice, just basically someone who would get it. I wanted to make mom friends.
Since having made mom friends, I can genuinely say that I don’t feel as lonely or as isolated anymore. It’s nice knowing that I have people I can talk to who will understand where I’m coming from, who will understand why I had a mental breakdown at 4am when my twins are sound asleep but I just feel this horrible ache of mom guilt for something that went wrong during the day.
So if you can relate to anything I’ve mentioned, don’t want to feel alone anymore, or you just want to friends who can relate to you, here are 5 easy ways to make mom friends.
Methods To Make Mom Friends:
Put Yourself Out There
What I mean by this is take your kiddos to parks, beaches, the zoo, even Target and you’ll be surrounded by mothers. A few times, I’ve been stopped by a mom who’s curious about my twins and we’ll have a conversation. It’s literally so easy to make mom friends sometimes.
Every time I go to Target I always see other moms and their little ones. It’s one of the few places I can take my twin boys and not feel alone even though I’m by myself. I’ll even talk to moms passing by who have friendly kids that loving saying “hi.”
It could just be me, but as a stay at home mom who only has conversations with two adults and babies who only babble, I live for interactions with other adults and going out to make mom friends really helps with that.
Reconnect With Old Friends
Since being pregnant with my twins, I’ve been able to make mom friends with old friends and acquaintances who are also mothers. Most of them have had kids before me so they were amazing resources to turn too and they were all so incredibly helpful and supportive.
I’ve had one mom friend give me bags and bags of baby clothes and baby items. I’ve had another (fellow twin) mom friend who gave me so much advice on my pregnancy, delivery, baby stuff, and so much more. They have both truly helped me in so many ways and made me feel much more prepared for motherhood.
So if you know any old friends, or even acquaintances, that you think would be worth reconnecting with, then I say give it a go. You never know what might come out of it.
Download A Mom Friend App
This is probably the easiest way that I have made mom friends in my area. I downloaded an app a few months after my babies were born because I was just so tired of feeling lonely and I wanted another support system.
The app the I use is called Peanut and it is the best mom friend finder app out there. It’s basically a tinder for moms. You create a profile and swipe through different profiles until you match with someone. It also has an online forum that has been so beneficial. I’ve learned from it and noticed that a lot of moms feel the same way I do about so many different things. I have been so many meaningful connections with other mothers that I have gone on play dates with and have vented too.
You also don’t have to be a lol to download it, you can be trying to conceive or pregnant as well to use it! There are so many other amazing things about Peanut. The best being that it is truly a community of supportive women and mothers.
If you’re interested in checking it out, you can download the app for free here.
Use Facebook Groups
If you haven’t already tried this method, I highly recommend search for mom friends groups on Facebook. There are literally so many and there are a lot of groups that are specified by location so you can meet mothers near you. Similar to the Peanut app.
I haven’t had too much success with this way yet, but I am in a few groups and have slowly been connecting with other moms in my area this way. I’m actually hoping to schedule a play date with one of the moms that I have met using this method sometime soon.
If you have tried using Facebook Groups to make mom friends, how has that worked for you? Comment down below.
Let Your Kiddos Do The Talking
I have been introduced to a few potential mom friends through their kids. My kids are pretty shy, but they always attract the attention of other little ones. Whether I’m at Target, or just walking around the neighborhood with them, children love waving and saying “hello” to them.
It only takes an instant to get your foot through the door and put yourself out there. You have a chance to make a friend. So why not take opportunities your little ones create for you. Plus, it’s a total bonus if your kids are around the same age. It’s perfect for future play dates.
Things To Consider:
This is one of the first things I look for when I’m trying to make a mom friend. I always want their to be some common ground, whether we’re the same age, our kids are the same age, or we enjoy the same hobbies.
I think this is kind of important because you want there to be some common ground. It makes connecting and planning play dates way easier when you both have something in common.
There Will Be Bad Dates
Oh yes, there definitely will be. I once forgot my stroller on two play dates (and as I mentioned in my must-have twin registry blog), I can’t go anywhere without it. It was disastrous for me. Bless my mom friend’s heart because she was a total lifesaver in both situations and we still continue to go on play dates till this day.
So should you find yourself in a sticky situation on a mom date, do not worry. We all understand, we’ve all been there. Chances are, we will be there for you and we will help you.
Trust Your Gut
If you ever feel uncomfortable or feel like certain mothers won’t be the best mom friends to have, then trust your gut. Not every mom is going to agree or get along with you. But don’t let that stop you!
There are so many moms out there and in your area that I know you’ll find one that you can connect with. Don’t let one sour apple ruin the whole bunch.
Motherhood doesn’t have to be lonely or isolating. You can find support from other mamas who feel exactly the same way you and I feel. I mean, we’re basically a whole community! All you have to do, is find us.
Thank you for reading today’s blog! I hope you enjoyed it and found it helpful with your motherhood journey. Comment down below what methods you’ve tried or what you would try to make mom fiends.
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Thank you again for reading today’s blog! I am so grateful for all your support. I couldn’t do this without all of you. Catch you on the next blog! (: